A GOOD CARD TRICK

Click on the cards 

or   http://www.youtube.com/v/Uh0CMcLiRkw&feature=share

IT'S SMARTER TO TRAVEL IN GROUPS

IT'S SMARTER TO TRAVEL IN GROUPS. TAKE THE BUS.

http://www.youtube.com/v/mgCIKGIYJ1A?hl=en&fs=1&autoplay=1

http://www.youtube.com/v/gBnvGS4u3F0?hl=en&fs=1&autoplay=1

http://www.youtube.com/v/LuVPnW0s3Vo?hl=en&fs=1&autoplay=1

JOKES (2)

• What is the longest word in the English language? 

        "Smiles". Because there is a mile between its first and last letters! 

• An English teacher wrote these words on the whiteboard: "woman without her man is nothing".The teacher then asked the students to punctuate the words correctly.

         The men wrote: "Woman, without her man, is nothing."
         The women wrote: "Woman! Without her, man is nothing." 

• A man was injected with a deadly poison, but, it did not kill him. Why? 

          He was already dead!

• What kind of ears does an engine have? 

          Engineers

• How do you count a herd of cows?  

          With a cowculator.

• What colour is the wind?  

         Blew

• What is an ig? 

          An Eskimo house without a loo.

• What did the big chimney say to the small chimney? 

           You're too young to smoke.

• What did one eye say to the other?  

          "Between us is something that smells."
·

APRIL FOOLS' DAY

April Fools' Day is celebrated in different countries around the world on April 1 every year. Sometimes referred to as All Fools' Day, April 1 is not a national holiday, but is widely recognized and celebrated as a day when many people play all kinds of jokes and foolishness. The day is marked by good-humoured or funny jokes, hoaxes, and other practical jokes on friends, family members, teachers, neighbours, work associates, etc.

  

Traditionally, in some countries such as New Zealand, the UK, Cyprus, and South Africa, the jokes only last until noon, and someone who plays a trick after noon is called an "April Fool" . In France, Italy, South Korea, Japan, Russia, The Netherlands, Germany, Brazil, Canada, Ireland, Australia, and the U.S., the jokes last all day.

In Spain and Ibero-America, an equivalent date is December 28, Christian day of celebration of the Massacre of the Innocents. The Christian celebration is a holiday, a religious one, but the tradition of pranks is observed yearly. After somebody plays a joke or a prank on somebody else, the joker usually cries out, in some regions of Ibero-America: "Inocente palomita que te dejaste engañar". In Spain, it is common to say just "Inocente!" . Nevertheless, in the Spanish island of Menorca, "Dia d'enganyar" is celebrated on April 1 because Menorca was a British possession during part of the 18th century.

 BUSCA EN EL DICCIONARIO LAS PALABRAS RESALTADAS EN AMARILLO.

JOKES

Jokes are also interesting to learn a language. Many of them are the same in other languages but others are specially British or American, since they play with words, meanings and similar sounds. Read these jokes and have fun!

Teacher: Mary, have you read "Freckles"?
Mary: No, mine are brown.

·    A big moron and a little moron were standing on a bridge.The big moron fell off. How come the little moron didn't?
- He was a little more on (the bridge)

·    Nine and ten don't exist anymore.
- Why?
- Because seven ate nine and ten.

·    Two men at the station:
- At what time does your train leave?
- At two to two. And what about yours?
- At two to two too!

·     Do you know why the ocean is blue?
- Because fish make blue, blue, blue, blue...

·    What is a fish without an eye?
A fsh!

·   Teacher: John, why are you doing your maths multiplication on the floor? 
John: You told me to do it without using a table.

·   Teacher: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
Glenn: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
Teacher: No, that's wrong
Glenn: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

·    Teacher: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
Donald: H I J K L M N O.
Teacher: What are you talking about?
Donald: Yesterday you said it's H to O. (H2O)